We all know our Love Language, right? Perhaps you may not – let me explain. Baptist pastor Gary Chapman coined the concept in the early 90’s and has taken the relationships world by storm. It is often the go-to topic on first dates and for those in relationships. The love language is said to provide reliable insights into how relationships function.
The 5 love languages are five different ways of expressing and receiving love. They are:
1. Words of Affirmation
2. Quality Time
3. Receiving Gifts
This love language is for people who feel loved when given a gift, “a visual symbol of love.” It is not about the monetary value but more so the symbolic thought behind the gift. They recognize the gift-giving process is about careful thought and reflection on something that represents the relationship.
4. Acts of Service
5. Physical Touch
We may express our love to our significant other regularly; however, we need to communicate how our partner wants to receive it. Love can get lost in translation when two partners speak different love languages.
If you want to find out your partners or your love language:
While I am a true romantic and love love, I wholeheartedly believe that the most important relationship we will ever have is the one with ourselves, cultivating our self-love.
For instance, if your love language is words of affirmation, make sure that you use positive affirmations on yourself such as writing a journal highlighting all the things you love about yourself. Do mirror work and see your beauty, or look into your eyes and say “I love you”.
If your love language is quality time, take time out for yourself to do the things you love. Read a book under a tree, go on a solo hike, take yourself to a beautiful restaurant…
If your love language is gifts, then buy yourself flowers or that item you have had your eye on. These do not need to be expensive gifts; however, treat yourself to show how much you appreciate you.
Knowing your love language is essential because, like anything else, it has a shadow side. When we lack self-love, our love languages can become our toxic traits.
If our language is an act of service, we might refuse to ask someone for help, and our desire for physical touch might mean we build a wall around us and withhold physical touch from our loved ones.
Remember, we cannot give what we do not have. It is essential to use all the love languages on ourselves so that we have it to give it away. We must be selfish to be selfless, as it is the pathway to a harmonious existence in both our internal and external worlds.
So, what love language are you going to use on yourself today? Right now, I am inspired, and I will take myself for a dip in the ocean. Yes, you have guessed it, my love language is quality time 😉